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Badly in love.....Help...or...

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Razor Blade:
Allright I just have to say it, I can't take it in anymore.

I just returned about a week and half ago from vacation, the problem is I fell in love with a girl there, now this ain't that bad because I go there on vacation twice a year.
The problem is however i'm really, really, REALLY badly in love at first i tought it would go over, that it was just casual.
I quickly discovered this wasn't the case.
Now she is 26 i'm 21(well soon I will be) at first I saw this as a problem, so I was in love but that age difference was bugging me so when I finally decided that age wasn't that much of a problem she wen't back home (well she lives like three hours away from me when i'm on vacation in Bosnia).
I know she feels the same about me but the age difference is preventing her to be with me together.
Now I do have her phone number but I feel that I can't call her or type a message about my feelings and all because it "feels" not right over the phone, I feel like I should tell it in her eyes.
But waiting a whole year isn't really that easy when you're really in love.
Also, she's reducing the contact between us because she knows my feelings(I think, there was flirting from both sides).
Anyhow a week before I headed back here to Belgium I discovered she found a boyfriend he is also there on vacation but he's from USA.
Now I don't know i'm preparing myself on that it could work between them so next year I come she might have someone, but I believe it won't last long because a relationship on distance is really hard especially when you're from USA that distance is really long....

I don't know what to do anymore, I also just graduated so i'm looking for a job atm, so I have lots of free time and I can't stop thinking about her, I feel lost, depressed and I feel it's afecting me when I go to a job interview.......
I just can't take it anymore...
any advice or something? please?

Mo:
You ain't gonna like this advice but here it is anyway:

Girls are fubar.  Don't waste your time over a fling.  It ain't worth it, you'll most likely get hurt in the end.  There will be tons more of these "falling in loves".

Finally if she's got a boyfriend, forget about it.  If you see her next year and she's single and interested and you're single and interested then go for it.  In the meantime try and move onto other things.

PS. Girls are crazy mental cases.  In case I didn't already mention that.

cuchulann:
*There is nothing wrong with a summer fling. Enjoy it for what it was.
*Long distance relationships don't work. This goes for that guy from the U.S. too.
*Under no circumstance should you enter into unrequited love. This only serves to make you write bad poetry and to miss out on plenty of eligible local ladies who are in fact interested in you.

**Best Case Scenario**
If the two of you are really into each other YOU will need to maintain a bare minimum of a bi-weekly contact, and that is for a girl who is honestly into you. I mean phone calls here, in e-mails and private chat or messaging you can't tell if they are kidding, teasing, or flat out lying. I fell to that one and that was with a girl I used to know pretty well. So with regular contact, at best you might be able to get to "Hey I'm going to be near your part of the world later on, want to meet for a drink or something?" or, Summer Fling part 2 "The Mid-Autum Meet-up."

Otherwise, best of luck to you in whatever, but don't try and tear your heart out for her no matter how masochistic you feel.

Razor Blade:
well the problem is I really don't think this is a fling anymore, I mean I had flings before her but they wen't soon over like in week or two, three...

I feel like this for over a month and it's really killing me it feels like every day it's worse and worse....I mean....I don't know....?

Talon:

--- Quote ---well the problem is I really don't think this is a fling anymore, I mean I had flings before her but they wen't soon over like in week or two, three...

--- End quote ---

The only problem is that this hasnt even reached potential fling status.

You both met up, you like her, youre unsure as to her feelings towards you.

Shes met up and was having a "fling" with a guy from the US - so at the moment hes one step ahead of you in that aspect. Now hes going back to the US - probably never likely to return, as he appears to have had his once-in-a-lifetime jaunt outside of the motherland.

All you can really do is keep up casual conversation. Call her at least once a week, and always have something to talk about, or at least be interested and conversational about what she has been doing. Theres nothing worse than a "what you been doing? - not much" conversation.

Dont come on too strong - if shes really distancing you, then it sounds like it could be a no go - although speaking with her would be the best way to judge that.

The whole year thing before meeting is a MASSIVE problem. Long distance relationships just dont work. Even long term relationships that suddenly become long distance are pretty much doomed.

If you are completely hopeless, test the waters to see if shes interested (bi-weekly phonecalls), go and visit if shes interested (you have just graduated so lots of free time), and potentially move out there to work for a few months if it works out (follow your heart! :P)

My advice - stop the empty fantasizing as it only leads to heartache.

p.s. Call her today, or not at all

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