Oh, and if you don't believe me, ask my arch-nemesis, John Ashcroft, who has resigned his cabinet position - the first of many rats to abandon the sinking ship.
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Why should Ashcroft stick around, he says his job is done:
"The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved. " -John Ashcroft
Well, yippy, yahoo, we Americans are safe from crime and terror! Someone should tell those various people in L.A. that are shooting other people. I guess they haven't heard the news yet.
"You can't shoot me, John Ashcroft said I was safe from crime and terror!"
-Dude just before other dude opens fire on him
-420