I bought RAGE a couple weeks ago and just beat it this morning. What an utter piece of shit.
So, I was checking out Amazon.com and there was this limited-time deal where I could get RAGE "Anarchy Edition" (includes pre-order bonus content and Sewer Missions DLC) for the PC for $19.50.
Now, my initial instinct is to be wary of a game that came out six months ago, now selling as a repackaged version with extra content for a third of the price of the original game. But I needed something to play between Diablo III beta ending and Diablo III release day. And besides, it was by id Software, so it couldn't be all that bad right?
Wrong.
First of all, let's just get this straight:
RAGE IS A FUCKING RACING GAME!Despite what lead designer, Matt Hooper, said in a
2008 interview with 1UP.com, RAGE is, in fact, a racing game. While you blindly bumble through the nonsensical main quests some of them require you to race in order to acquire better vehicles and vehicle upgrades. This is because there are two types of currency in the game, "money" and "racing certificates". Racing certificates, which can only be gained by racing, are used to buy better vehicles and vehicle upgrades while money is used for everything else (weapons, ammo, supplies, engineering components, gambling, etc.).
The overwhelming focus on racing wouldn't have been
so bad, I guess, if the actual vehicle controls and physics didn't suck so fucking bad. The game was obviously made for a console control (the manual includes the button setup for Xbox PC controller) and this is reflected in how poorly it handles the traditional keyboard/mouse FPS interface. This, coupled with the numerous places where your vehicle catches on the terrain, makes for a truly frustrating driving experience.
Second, (yes that was all just my first point), the game is
completely derivative.
In fact, "derivative" may be an understatement. RAGE lacks any hint of creativity or originality. At best, it is a failed attempt at a parody of the FPS genre. At worst, it is a poorly realized fanboy's homage to games that didn't suck ass.
RAGE tries to be a bit of DOOM, Quake, Fallout, and BioShock (with a little American McGee's Alice sprinkled in for good measure) all crammed haphazardly into a racing game. The end result is a drab, static environment with unimaginative NPCs, repetitive quests, and no explanation about any of the things you are being told to do, or why you are even motivated to give a fuck about the other losers in the game for that matter.
It was actually so painful that, at some point, I found myself just rushing through the quests, praying for the game to end.
When I finally beat the game this morning, "rage" is the only way I can describe how I felt about the ending. Even Throbble, who only watched me play bits of the game, hung her head when she saw the crappy end movie that was my reward for 32 and a half hours of boredom and frustration.
RAGE is an epic failure and it marks a sad day for the video game industry when a developer like id Software releases a product of such amateurish quality.
-420
WARNING: The attached pictures may contain spoilers but I can't tell since the plot didn't make any sense anyway. Also, I don't mind the occasional easter egg, but it's kinda sad when that is all your game has.
