Author Topic: Badly in love.....Help...or...  (Read 52629 times)

Offline Razor Blade

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Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #90 on: January 05, 2008, 10:36:38 AM »
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lmfao, dude. You seriously need to chill out a bit. Obviously you want to have a relationship with her. You might think it could be hard, you may think the age difference has a huge impact, but you nonetheless want to hook up with her. You can't deny that with how many times you've made it obvious. So with that in mind, just fucking do it. If every single time she is going to so much as talk to you, you're going to think about her for days on end, then just get it over with. So she is older, true, but so what? You've both reached an age where age itself doesn't matter quite as much. People change alot, so age difference will have an affect, but between 22 and 26 there's not too much difference, it's only 4 years. As for distance, if you're together distantly, for a long time, your bond will probably be stronger when you do get to be together. If you don't end up having it work out and are still distant, then at least you don't have to suffer seperation when your bond is the strongest.

From what I see, there's no reason you shouldn't try if you want to. The only things that you say are getting in the way are only in the way if you're afraid of getting hurt. (Afraid of it not working translates into afraid of getting hurt. Because, if it not working doesn't hurt, then you would have nothing to be afraid of, would you?)

The way you make your post is as though you are simply looking for people to encourage you to go for it, you want the green light. You want the green light because you actually do want to go for it. You're not actually going to decide to do it or not based on what we tell you, you're just wanting an easy answer to something you can only decide yourself.

No matter how you look at it, it's your decision, and what you choose to do is going to be almost if not completely uninfluenced by most of what we tell you. In the end, you're just procrastinating and holding the decision off for later. Eventually you may not be able to make a decision any longer and have it made for you, when she ends up moving away or you somehow lose touch with her completely and never hear from her again. At that point, you'll have wished you made a decision before it was too late, even if you've gotten over her.

Long and short: You want to. So do it. If you do, and it fails: Oh well, that happens; welcome to life. =)

P.S. Anyway, I thought you were 21? :huh:
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Nice one hell, I didn't know you had it in you to be so deep, anyway you made a tiny mistake, I'm not posting that message so other people could make the decision for me or anything of that sort, the only thing I post this is, is just that I can get it out of my system writing about it works kinda relaxing for me, in the end it's my decision no matter what other people say.

And Yes I would give it a chance to be together, but the problem is she is having second toughts, doubts and shit so in the end it's up to her i can't force her....

And yes i'm 21 i'm gonna be 22 this year.
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Soul Sojourner

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« Reply #91 on: January 05, 2008, 07:10:41 PM »
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Nice one hell, I didn't know you had it in you to be so deep, anyway you made a tiny mistake, I'm not posting that message so other people could make the decision for me or anything of that sort, the only thing I post this is, is just that I can get it out of my system writing about it works kinda relaxing for me, in the end it's my decision no matter what other people say.

And Yes I would give it a chance to be together, but the problem is she is having second toughts, doubts and shit so in the end it's up to her i can't force her....

And yes i'm 21 i'm gonna be 22 this year.
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I didn't say that you posted it so others could make the decision for you. I said you want an easy answer but in the end you'll be the only one who can make the decision. Exactly, your decision no matter what people say... I think I said that a few times, actually. No, I wasn't saying you truly thought we would give you your answer. I was saying you want us to tell you what you want to hear, basically. :lol:
That's the nature of seeking advice, people already know what they need to do, they just ask to either get reassurance from others who back up their decision, or they are simply asking to be told what they know they have to do but are having a hard time coming to terms with.

You're saying it's up to her, but you haven't made the proposition yet, so it's still up to both of you. You can't expect her to say yes or no, without first asking the question. So she's having second thoughts? So what? That's her decision. Your decision is not her decision and her decision is not your decision. You both have to decide whether you want to or not individually. And if you want to, then you put it on the table and allow her to think about it. Otherwise, she doesn't know whether you want to or not, and may be doing the same exact thing as you. The decision for you to both enter a relationship is up to both of you, but the decision to ask her is yours, and the decision for her to ask you is hers. And if neither of you ask, but both want to, then you both decided yes, but never said yes. So neither of you would still know, would you?

What I'm saying is: If you want to then ask her. If she wants to or doesn't want to after you ask her, she'll tell you. But first you have to ask, first you have to talk it over. If you can't talk things over as it is, then your relationship is doomed to fail until you learn how. All relationships depend on communication. If you ask her, and she says no, so what? It's just like I said in my last post. At least you asked, at least you brought it up. Don't be afraid of rejection. Asking doesn't automatically mean you'll enter a relationship, but you never will if neither of you bring it up at all.

You're right when you say you can't force her, but you also can't expect her to decide at all if you don't talk to her about it first. Right?
« Last Edit: January 05, 2008, 07:16:53 PM by HeLLMasteRHeLL »

Offline Razor Blade

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« Reply #92 on: January 06, 2008, 12:00:54 PM »
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I didn't say that you posted it so others could make the decision for you. I said you want an easy answer but in the end you'll be the only one who can make the decision. Exactly, your decision no matter what people say... I think I said that a few times, actually. No, I wasn't saying you truly thought we would give you your answer. I was saying you want us to tell you what you want to hear, basically. :lol:
That's the nature of seeking advice, people already know what they need to do, they just ask to either get reassurance from others who back up their decision, or they are simply asking to be told what they know they have to do but are having a hard time coming to terms with.

You're saying it's up to her, but you haven't made the proposition yet, so it's still up to both of you. You can't expect her to say yes or no, without first asking the question. So she's having second thoughts? So what? That's her decision. Your decision is not her decision and her decision is not your decision. You both have to decide whether you want to or not individually. And if you want to, then you put it on the table and allow her to think about it. Otherwise, she doesn't know whether you want to or not, and may be doing the same exact thing as you. The decision for you to both enter a relationship is up to both of you, but the decision to ask her is yours, and the decision for her to ask you is hers. And if neither of you ask, but both want to, then you both decided yes, but never said yes. So neither of you would still know, would you?

What I'm saying is: If you want to then ask her. If she wants to or doesn't want to after you ask her, she'll tell you. But first you have to ask, first you have to talk it over. If you can't talk things over as it is, then your relationship is doomed to fail until you learn how. All relationships depend on communication. If you ask her, and she says no, so what? It's just like I said in my last post. At least you asked, at least you brought it up. Don't be afraid of rejection. Asking doesn't automatically mean you'll enter a relationship, but you never will if neither of you bring it up at all.

You're right when you say you can't force her, but you also can't expect her to decide at all if you don't talk to her about it first. Right?
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You're right hell, thanks for the advice i'll think about your words too.
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Soul Sojourner

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Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #93 on: January 06, 2008, 06:13:45 PM »
Of course, of course.

Good luck in this endeavor.

Offline Mo

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Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #94 on: January 06, 2008, 07:55:21 PM »
I didn't know she knows your family.

Offline Razor Blade

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« Reply #95 on: January 06, 2008, 09:07:30 PM »
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I didn't know she knows your family.
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ehm....if she's the best friend of my niece....and my niece is my niece so I can't see why she wouldn't know of my familly....?
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Mo

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Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #96 on: January 06, 2008, 10:00:58 PM »
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ehm....if she's the best friend of my niece....and my niece is my niece so I can't see why she wouldn't know of my familly....?
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Right.  That much is obvious.  Now after re-reading my question notice it states that *I* didn't know that she knew your family.  Meaning that I can not recall you ever mentioning that before.


:)

Offline Razor Blade

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« Reply #97 on: January 07, 2008, 05:58:02 AM »
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Right.  That much is obvious.  Now after re-reading my question notice it states that *I* didn't know that she knew your family.  Meaning that I can not recall you ever mentioning that before.
:)
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Maybe I forgot to mention it, but she knows us for now it's gonna be 3 years but she knows me for 2 years cuz, 3 years ago i didn't go with my parents on holiday I wanted to be home alone for 4 weeks and party day in day out lol (that's the first time with a girl i had you know what.) anyway that's about it.
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Soul Sojourner

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« Reply #98 on: January 07, 2008, 07:49:45 PM »
What? Sex? Lmfao. "had you know what" he says. :lol:

Offline Razor Blade

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« Reply #99 on: January 07, 2008, 09:04:34 PM »
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What? Sex? Lmfao. "had you know what" he says. :lol:
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LoL i dunno if I could use the S-word here but yeah the first time I had sex lol....
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #100 on: January 08, 2008, 12:09:43 AM »
Congrats. lol

Offline Soul Sojourner

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« Reply #101 on: January 08, 2008, 03:10:08 AM »
We can say fuck and cunt freely and you're wondering about the word sex!? :rofl:

Offline Razor Blade

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #102 on: April 07, 2008, 08:35:13 PM »
Women are weird....really weird.....I could almost say they are bitches but I can't at the moment i'll stay at that one word: "Weird"....
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Mo

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #103 on: April 07, 2008, 10:55:53 PM »
Finally.  Now you can appreciate what a useless endeavor it was to begin this thread =)

Offline Anheg

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #104 on: April 08, 2008, 01:03:33 PM »
Just dont forget the picnic supplies!

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Offline Razor Blade

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #105 on: April 08, 2008, 01:19:57 PM »
Finally.  Now you can appreciate what a useless endeavor it was to begin this thread =)

Yeah, well nog it's about a different girl and well.....it's just weird I don't know if she's intrested or not....we talk alot, via msn, phone, text messages and all.

Me and a couple of friends been over to her house where she was and couple of her friends, been to party's together and shit.

I asked her out, she said oke but I have to ask my parents, and guess what they don't let her lol, but yeah sure they let you bring over guys to your home when they are not there.....just freaking weird...
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Razor Blade

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #106 on: August 08, 2009, 08:23:27 PM »
Allright I just have to say it, I can't take it in anymore.

I just returned about a week and half ago from vacation, the problem is I fell in love with a girl there, now this ain't that bad because I go there on vacation twice a year.
The problem is however i'm really, really, REALLY badly in love at first i tought it would go over, that it was just casual.
I quickly discovered this wasn't the case.
Now she is 26 i'm 21(well soon I will be) at first I saw this as a problem, so I was in love but that age difference was bugging me so when I finally decided that age wasn't that much of a problem she wen't back home (well she lives like three hours away from me when i'm on vacation in Bosnia).
I know she feels the same about me but the age difference is preventing her to be with me together.
Now I do have her phone number but I feel that I can't call her or type a message about my feelings and all because it "feels" not right over the phone, I feel like I should tell it in her eyes.
But waiting a whole year isn't really that easy when you're really in love.
Also, she's reducing the contact between us because she knows my feelings(I think, there was flirting from both sides).
Anyhow a week before I headed back here to Belgium I discovered she found a boyfriend he is also there on vacation but he's from USA.
Now I don't know i'm preparing myself on that it could work between them so next year I come she might have someone, but I believe it won't last long because a relationship on distance is really hard especially when you're from USA that distance is really long....

I don't know what to do anymore, I also just graduated so i'm looking for a job atm, so I have lots of free time and I can't stop thinking about her, I feel lost, depressed and I feel it's afecting me when I go to a job interview.......
I just can't take it anymore...
any advice or something? please?

Oke, lol major deja vu feeling :D

I made this post 2 years ago when I got home from vacation...

Well today about 4 hours ago I returned home from my vacation, and well i tought to inform you guys that me and this girl i wrote about wich you can see in my quoted area are togehter now.
BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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Offline Mo

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #107 on: August 08, 2009, 10:46:26 PM »
Omg a real life Fairy Tale ending!

WAAAAHOOOO!!

Good job brother :D

Offline Razor Blade

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Re: Badly in love.....Help...or...
« Reply #108 on: August 29, 2009, 09:55:07 PM »
Omg a real life Fairy Tale ending!

WAAAAHOOOO!!

Good job brother :D

Thanks man :D

BoSnIaN pRiDe Is My MiNd, BoSnIaN bLoOd Is My KiNd, So StEp AsIdE, & LeT uS tHrOuGh, CaUsE iTs AlL aBoUt, tHe bOsNiAn CreW!



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